Kimmy's Halloween

                                     Here Kimmy was, last Halloween, on the 4th floor of the women's center at St. Joseph's.  We all have the Happy Meals that Deborah and Vivian brought to us.  You can't see it in the picture, but they also had brought me a recliner to catch some z's with Kimmy.
                                     And, she was the picture of strength.  For us.  I'm amazed at how much younger Tonio and Cody look.  They seemed to have aged about five years a piece in the last year. 

                                    It has been like running uphill these last few days, sorting through what happened.  The memories.  My team noticed it today at work...

                               I think that initially, going through the emails was good therapy, but, the last two or three days, it has been excruciating.  Here's one, to my Dad,  that brought a smile to my face:

"Did you have a nice birthday? Oh, Autumn just showed me your email - glad
to hear you had a nice birthday! What will you do for your anniversary??

Kim's chemo will be pushed back again. They are still draining the abscess,
trying to get her blood values right and working on the clots in her lung
and leg. We were able to take a walk for the first time since Friday, but
it wiped her out for the rest of the day and she is back on morphine and
dilaudid. Hopefully, we'll hear some good news tomorrow. I have a tricky
one - I'll drop the kids off at school and then have a tire appt. at 8:30
(one of the Expeditions tires finally gave out, luckily, it was in the
garage when it happened!). I'll go to the hospital until 2:30 and then pick
up the kids from school - Autumn and Tonio's teachers are keeping them until
3:30 to help them with homework and tutor them where needed, so I'll get
Cody at 3 and Patti, Autumn's teacher, Mrs. Rudzena's, mom, will bring Aut
and Tonio to me at the house. Then, Tonio has a musical performance at the
school at 5 o'clock. I'm hoping to go back to the hospital right after I
tape it to show Kim.

Let us know how your celebrate on Thursday - 15 years did fly by!! Love,
Dave"

          And one, to Kimmy's Mom, that still brings me to my knees...

"I just got in and did not want to fill you in this late on things. Thought I'd use this email, as we have kept the kids informed on everything that has been in my nightly updates, so far. Kim had a pretty great day today - positive attitude, got out of bed twice for an hour or two to sit next to me in a chair, ate her first solid food for dinner (fish, potato, green beans) and her pain killers and oxygen were reduced. We enjoyed each other's company, talked and watched movies. Tomorrow morning, there will be an MRI on her brain and we should get the results back for her Thyroid scan.

Now, the exact terminology I have been told, is that her cancer originated in her lungs and is of the Adenocarcinoma variety. I've stayed up well past one each night reading all I can and it seems this is the most common lung cancer in America right now, among women, non-smokers. The Drs are astonished to find it in a woman of Kim's good health and great condition. So far, we are happy with the team that is working for her - they seem aggressive, clear communicators and are on hand - her Oncologist actually answered the phone when I called him - I've never had that happen in my years of asthma, allergies, and most recently, right ear treatment or any other medical doctor. But, I've begun researching alternatives, just in case. University Medical Center here in Tucson has a whole facility dedicated to cancer treatment. In Phoenix, they have a Mayo Clinic and Cancer Treatment Center of America.

But, we should have a more clear understanding of what is going on tomorrow and no treatment can start until Kim's breathing is under control. She is still on Heparin and should go on Cuminin tomorrow for the blood clots. Dr. Atkinson stopped in today to say her hemoglobin looks good.

I will call you Monday morning after I drop the kids off at school, but wanted to present the facts so that you had them. We still have a lot of testing to do - they need to do the full body PET scan, as soon as Kim is able, to pinpoint any other organs affected and I've been waiting until I have more answers to call.

OK, I'll talk to you soon. Love, Dave"

 

             That's all I have in me tonight.  Not sure what we've accomplished, but, I hope you've gained some insight - I was trying so hard to quarterback this thing...so hard.